A Letter From Nick Swisher to Yankee Fans

Yo Yo wassup Yankee fans!

I thought we were bros! We had a good thing going, ya know? I was super-pumped..naw man pumped isn’t even the word..I was AMPED to be here man.

I had my whole bro-salute-the-stands thing when you yelled my name during role call. Jeter barely even waves, and he’s loved. I turn around and give you a bro-salute, and I get treated like this? C’mon man, this is totally not cool.

Yo, I mean, I feel you and all. I’m not hitting that great, but nobody is hitting great. It would be super awesome if you didn’t boo me all the time bros. You can’t blame me for messing up to routine plays either, I don’t know if you ever noticed, but I’m really not a great fielder.

My boy Derek got hurt, but it wasn’t my fault his ankle snapped like a surfboard on a totally huge wave bro.

I can’t believe that you peeps boo A-Rod so much either. Dude pulled the ultimate bro-move in 2009 when he carried this team to a Championship. Now all you guys hate him. I don’t get it.

I just want to say again that some of you dudes have been cool, but ya gotta stop booing me, ok? I’m just a laid-back happy dude who doesn’t need to get booed by people who he was bros with.

So Yankee fans, please stop being douchers and get back to being my bro.

Thanks bros,


PS…Can somebody please help me with my eye-black? I can never put it on correctly


About B Roe

Tall, charming, handsome sports fanatic.
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One Response to A Letter From Nick Swisher to Yankee Fans

  1. pissed off pops says:

    he’s a clown

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