NFL WEEK FIVE PICKS!

Dolphins @ Bengals-

Matt – Ryan Tannehill will continue his good form from last week and use his new weapon Jabar Gaffney to beat an overrated Bengals D. Reggie Bush has a good game and the dolphins win in a shootout.  Miami 35 – Cincinnati 31

Brenden- I have no explanation for this but I think the Dolphins are going to win 23-17.

Rob – Two young QBs facing off against above – maybe just overrated – average defenses could be a really fun game. Going against the grain and picking the Bengals, riding the hot hand.

Packers @ Colts-

Matt – Aaron Rodgers will finally have a huge week against the Andrew Luck led Colts. Luck will have a decent game, but is put in his place by one of the league’s elite. Green Bay 35 – Indianapolis 21

Brenden- RAGAHHS HEY RADGAHHHSS!!! Colts don’t have enough LUCK (see what I did there?) to pull this one out. Packers 38-17

Rob – Colts really aren’t all that good and if Luck struggles they have no chance, which they have even if Luck doesn’t struggle. Green Bay builds off last week and destroys the Colts, Rodgers has a huge game.

Ravens @ Chiefs-

Matt – League rushing leader Jamal Charles has a huge day as the Chiefs surprise Baltimore at Arrowhead Stadium. Kansas City 24 – Baltimore 21

Brenden- Baltimore is going to win the Superbowl. Also, they’ll win on the road as the Chiefs continue to disappoint. Ravens 24-21

Rob – The Chiefs could surprise everyone and not get crushed in this game. I don’t see Kansas City’s offense clicking at any point to gain momentum. On the other hand Flacco and Rice are starting to rival Schoster.

Browns @ Giants-  

Matt – An angry Eli Manning lights up a Joe Haden-less Browns D, even with a depleted receiving core. Brandon Weeden reminds us that he’s just an older rookie and throws at least 2 picks, but Richardson does find the end zone once.. New York 31 – Cleveland 10

Brenden- The Giants are banged up, but they are playing a pee-wee team this week. Giants 27-13

Rob – Giants are coming home after having a really subpar offensive performance against the Eagles. I wouldn’t expect the Giants to have back to back performances like that and even if they wanted to they would have to try really hard against the dreadful Cleveland Browns.

Eagles @ Steelers-

Matt – The Battle for Pennsylvania….I’ll go with the home team. The Steelers will actually convert on Mike Vick’s mistakes and the Eagles lose a close one. Pittsburgh 28 – Philadelphia 24

Brenden-THE GUY WHO RAPED SOMEBODY loses to the GUY WHO KILLED AND MURDERED INNOCENT DOGS. Eagles 27-17.

Rob – This could be a fun game to watch if you want to see two offenses play well below their abilities. The Eagles defense is overshadowed by the poor performance by the Offense and the Steelers, well, it’s hard to play football when using walkers on the field. Eagles win as their offense finally clicks.

Falcons @ Redskins-

Matt – another continuing theme…the falcons offense is really f*cking good… Matty Ice shreds horrible skins pass d. Atlanta 42 – Washington 21

Brenden-The Redskins is a really racist name isn’t it? Seriously, think about it… yup it is. In honor of Columbus day the Matt Ryan rapes an pilages the Redskins secondary on a way to the Falcons winning 30-20

Rob – RGIII has had a lot of success this season so far and has tourched the, debatably, good Bengals defense. The Falcons D is actually really good, actually really really good, so he will struggle. Matt Ryan continues his march to becoming an elite Quarterback and takes his team to 5-0.

Seahawks @ Panthers-

Matt – Cam Newton will finally get his groove back. Superman hooks up with Steve Smith twice and the Panthers beat a surprising Seahawks team. Carolina 28 – Seattle 13

Brenden-I like the Seahawks D, but I;m not sold on Russell Wilson yet. Cam show him how it gets done. Panthers 24-10

Rob – I can speak for every NFL fan when I say Cam Newton’s new ESPN commercial is hilarious and so has his performance this year so far. That’s actually not fair considering last year was one of the best performances from a rookie QB in the history of the NFL. Cam has to adjust to the linebackers flooding the box to prevent the run game he is so good at. Cam trusts his arm and it works in this low scoring affair, Panters win because Seattle is good but their offense isn’t.

Bears @ Jaguars-

Matt – If the bears can shut down Tony Romo and the cowboys in Jerryworld, I don’t know what they will do to poor Blaine Gabbert.  Chicago 27 – Jacksonville 10

Brenden-Blaine Gabbert has been Google-ing “different sick day excuses” and has also been crying himself to sleep every night thinking about the Bears defense. Bears 23-14

Rob – There is really nothing to say here, MJD probably should’ve continued to hold out because the Jags are a disgrace. Bears win, Cutler is going to make everyone a believer again…until next week.

Titans @ Vikings-

Matt – In a battle of intriguing highly drafted QB’s and running backs on the comeback, Percy Harvin proves to be the difference as the Vikes squeak by. Minnesota 24 – Tennessee 23

Brenden-Chris Johnson shreds the Vikings defense in a 150+ yard effort. Adrian Peterson outshines him, but Hasslebeck leads the Titans to a late TD. Titans 24-23

Rob – Vikings may struggle a little bit in this game but their run game and special teams efforts win them the game. Hasselbeck has an impressive game and the Jets may start putting in calls to see if he’s available. Vikings win a fun one.

Broncos @ Patriots-

Matt – Tom Brady will continue to stay hot after his scorching 2nd half performance against buffalo. Peyton will fall behind again, but just won’t have the weapons to catch up to a dangerous Pats offense. New England 31 – Denver 27

Brenden- Broncos hold tough and upset New England at home 30-27

Rob – This was the game of the year, every year, 3 years ago…I don’t see that being the case anymore. Hopefully the two veterans prove me wrong but I hope the Patriots blow them out because I have to help someone move and can’t watch the game. I hate picking against my team but I can see Denver winning this game.

Bills @ 49ers-

Matt – The Niners will continue to thrash AFC East opponents. Patrick Willis and Co will dominate a battered Bills offense. San Francisco 24 – Buffalo 3

Brenden-The Bills are not even close to being as physical as the 49ers. Niners 20-16

RobThe 49ers destroyed the Jets last week and proved they can be explosive on offense. I don’t see it happening back to back weeks and when faced with a good passing and running game the 49ers struggled, Buffalo does not have a good defense though. 49ers win.

Chargers @ Saints-

Matt – The Saints finally get a w without Sean Payton; Drew Brees takes things personal and throws for over 4 bills.  New Orleans 27 – San Diego 17

Brenden-Drew Brees gets revenge, and the Saints first win, jump-starting a miraculous run to the playoffs… Saints 30-20

Rob – Saints win because Rivers finally throws a ton of intereceptions and starts to cry.

Texans @ Jets-

Matt – Jets suck, and they will get blown out. Schaub throws for 300, Australian Beer runs for 150 and the Texans tough d shuts down a useless Jets offense. Houston 31 – New York 6

Brenden- “WE WANT TEBOW” chants will be loud by the 2nd quarter…by the 3rd “WE WANT MCELROY” by the 4th, “WE WANT BARKLEY” Texans 30-10

Rob – Schoster takes flight against the horrible Jets and hopefully Fireman Ed falls of that guys shoulders and can’t go to any more games. Houston is winning the Super Bowl this year and have no trouble with the Jets.

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About B Roe

Tall, charming, handsome sports fanatic.
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