College Survival Tip: What To Do When You Don’t Have a Football Team

As a graduate of the esteemed State University of New York College at Oneonta (they told us to write it out like that–instead of just SUNY Oneonta–so it looks more prestigious) I know a thing or two about surviving without a good football team.

I should be honest here…our football team has been undefeated since 1889, however that’s only because we don’t have a football team.

The “Stoned Dragon” mascot would have struck fear into the heart of opponents

Don’t get me wrong, O-State has other teams, but we were Division III. If we did field a football team we would have looked like the Little Giants.

So, what the hell are you supposed to do on a Saturday afternoon in the fall? You don’t see people tailgating for women’s soccer games, and if you don’t have a football team then your sports-watching life will be relegated to the TV.

Really I can’t offer much advice on top of picking a favorite college team and rooting for them all season. This advice is also extended to students at Penn State, since their season is in the toilet before it’s even begun.

The only other advice I can really offer?


Otherwise, every Saturday morning you are going to wake up and wish it was your schools’ mascot head Lee Corso was wearing. You’ll know that your “hi mom, send $$” sign would have been the best out of all of them.

But, alas, you are not in that crowd, you’re stuck in your dorm with that smelly, still-drunkenly-passed-out roommate of yours.

Have fun at school kids!


About B Roe

Tall, charming, handsome sports fanatic.
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